Angel's Thoughts
by xlilkissesangelx
Summary: What if Buffy was able to read Angel's thoughts in Season threes "Earshot". My spin on a regular fan fiction favourite.
1. Chapter 1

Buffy walks into the mansion.

This is it. If anytime since I met Angel I thought that somehow I would be able to hear Angel's thoughts, know what really goes through his head, about me, us? But I'm about too, I'm about to know everything I have always wanted, what I thought I never would.

But I'm scared. What if I hear what I don't want to. Do I really want to know. But I cant live with not knowing when I have this one chance to find out everything I need to know I have before Giles finds out how to get rid of this thought reading power those demons infected in me before I go insane.

Oh my god, I see him.

" Buffy" Angel says, his eyes widening at my presence.

"Hi" I reply.

**_What is she doing here. At least she is here. I thought she wouldn't want to be around me for a while after the Faith incident last week._**

Oh my god I can hear him.

" I just thought I would stop by, see how you are doing" I reply, trying to keep a conversation going so he doesn't sense anything odd.

**_Does she mean how I am doing after Faith? Does she want to discuss what happened? Should I mention it?_**

" You know after what happened with Faith" I reply following the path of his thoughts.

"Do you want to discuss it?" he asks me.

" Do you think we need to?" I reply.

_**She sounds angry. She is angry at me. I was dreading this. I should of knew she would be. I wonder how it felt for her to see me kissing Faith. I mean if it was the other way round.**_

" If you want to discuss it" he states staring intently at me, so much his intense glare seems to penetrate me.

Think, ask him something so I can found out what I need to know.

" Do you love me" I ask suddenly, Talk about getting straight to the point.

He stares at me, suddenly his intense gaze widening, somewhat shocked.

And then I hear his mind.

**_Why would she ask that? Is she questioning my love for her? What happened with Faith has ruined everything_**

**_Having to go along with Faith, pretending to be Angelus, kissing Faith, it has made her think that I don't love her._**

" I cant believe you need to ask that" he comes back with, somewhat harshly.

" How can I not" I reply.

**_Please don't do this Buffy. If you only knew. Your my everything! If I lose you through this,... I just cant._**

" But you kissed her" I reply, I need to hear more.

" It was an act, I did it to make her believe I was on her side, to find out what we needed to know" he states, I can hear the anger coming out in his voice, " If I hurt you, I am sorry, more than you know, but I did it to keep up the act, I had no choice"

_**Please understand , If she leaves me over this.**_

" I just cant get it out of my head, I don't think, I don't think I can forget it,..., I don't think I can carry on like it didn't " I say.

I couldn't bear to be without him, he and Faith has hurt me so much, and I need to hear him, hear him say he wants me, not Faith.

Faith, with her sexy dark hair, and bad girl attitude.

Sometimes I think the pair of them are so alike, both with dark sides, they must really connect in ways I could never with him.

And then I hear his thoughts bellowing out.

_**This is it. She's leaving me. I knew it. I knew I had lost her.**_

" Faith, you two are so alike" I begin to explain.

" Buffy are you being serious" he snaps.

_**She can't think that I seriously wants Faith, can she. I mean Faith is even working with the Mayor. Not only does she think I want Faith and not her but she thinks I want someone on the bad side. To be on the bad side. Why would she think that. Does she really not trust me?**_

" I think we shouldn't see each other I more" I state.

I don't mean it, I couldn't bear it, but I decide to press his buttons. I need to hear how he reacts.

His head soon tells me.

_**No. No. No. No. **_**She cant be doing this. **

**I've lost her for good through this. Through something I just had to go along with so I could get information to help. If you only know how much I love you. Need you. If I couldn't see you again,..., I don't think I could cope.**

My heart flutters at his thoughts.

" Buffy, please..." Angel begins before I cut him off.

" I need to go" I state and quickly leave.

I hear his thoughts as he silently watches me leaves helplessly.

_**She's going. She just leaving. Is that it. She cant just leave it like this.**_

He loves me. He needs me. I cant get the image of him and Faith out of my head, even if was just an act but its everything I wanted to hear.

Now I just have to figure out how to make this right.

To be continued ...


	2. Chapter 2

" You heard Angels thoughts" Willow smiles, euphuistic as ever.

**Buffy heard Angel's thoughts, that's amazing, if only I could read Oz's when I talk to him.**

I grin widely at Willow's reply, as well as her trail of thoughts following it.

" This whole aspect of the demon thing doesn't suck in all categories" I answer.

" Buffy this is really amazing" Willow mirrors my grin, " I mean, you now know everything you ever wanted to know, how Angel really feels about you, everything you wanted to know...about Faith" she mummers.

**I hope I didn't upset her mentioning Faith.**

I sigh.

" Yeah I know,..., I mean, now I know he only kissed Faith to keep up the act, which I think I knew deep down anyway,... I just wanted to know what he felt kisses her,..., did he enjoy it?" I say as we both walk into the library and see Xander sitting alone at the table, head deep in books.

" And what did he say,..., or shall I say what did he think?" Willow replies.

" He was pretty horrified that I could think that he would want Faith, especially as she is on Team Bad" I answer as I put my bag down on the table next to Xander.

" Team Bad" Xander asks looking up at us.

**Wow Buffy looks hot today,...oh god I hope she didn't hear that.**

" Yes, you know the team the bad guys are on,..., specifically Faith and her friend the Mayor" I answer as I sit down next to him, ignoring his thoughts about me.

" And so we would be the good guys I assume,..., you, me, Wills, Oz and Giles" he grins and then chuckles, " Oh and don't forget Cordy"

" Wow, Cordy fighting the forces of bad" I reply with smile.

" You'd be surprised" Xander snorts," And what about Angel?"

" Angel" I answer.

" What side is he on after last weeks performance?" Xander says, in a more serious tone now.

I look at Willow and we share a look.

" I went to see Angel yesterday" I reply.

I soon hear Xanders head.

**Even after he pretends to be evil and kisses Faith, she still goes and sees him. Why wont she see what he is.**

I ignore him and continue.

" I went to see him, and asked him some questions, and I heard his thoughts" I state.

" You heard Angel's thoughts, huh" Xander huffs.

" I heard that it was an act, everything what he did with Faith, he did it to keep his cover so he could found out what her and the Mayor are up to,

he found out what ever is going down, is going down Graduation Day remember" I explain.

" So him punching me in the face was just an act was it" Xander retorts.

" Look he hurt me too, but he did it because he was trying to help us" I say.

" I'm sorry Buffy I am, but wake up and smell the coffee" Xander snaps.

"Xander -" Willow tries to put in.

" You saw what he is like" Xander replies raising his voice.

"I heard him, he hated doing it, it was act to find out information for us, ... I heard him say he loves me" I state.

Xander frowns.

" You know what, you believe what you want" Xander exhales, standing up to leave.

" Xander wait" I call after him but he is soon out the library door.

I huff and Willow sits down next to me.

" Ignore Xander,... they have never got on" Willow softly says.

" I know" I half smile.

" You just need to make it right with Angel, now you now everything that you needed to know" Willow explains.

" Yep" I answer.

* * *

Outside Angels Mansion. 

* * *

To be continued...


	3. Chapter 3

Outside Angels Mansion.

Ok here goes nothing.

I run my fingers through my hair and tug at my white blouse which I have put on specially as I walk up to Angels Mansion.

Do I tell him about the whole aspect of the demon and that I have been able to read his thoughts or is that just going to make him mad and make him think that I have been playing him to find out information.

But if I don't tell him he is going to think I lied to him the whole time and kept it from him that I was able to read his thoughts.

Ok, just be honest. That's the best way to do this.

Suddenly my phone rings.

" Hello" I answer.

" Buffy its me, where are you?" I hear Giles reply.

" Err,..., I am at home why?" I lie, giving Xander's reaction today to me and Angel it might as well be better to say am I somewhere other than here.

" Oh right, well I just called your home and your mother said you left about half an hour ago" he states with a stern tone to his voice like he has caught me out.

" Err yeah,..., I was at home,..., but now I am out,..., patrolling,..., you know, slayer, patrolling, work work work" I stutter.

" Buffy you need to get home urgently, me and Wesley are on our way right now, there was a guy who had the same thing as you, the aspect of the demon, it has made him insane, he is completely cut off from all of humanity and unable to communicate with any other being whatsoever through it, we need to remove this thing from you immediately" he orders.

" Ok, I'll head home now, Ill just be -" I say before I gasp at what I see before me.

I see Angel, through the window.

Talking.

To Faith.

To be continued...


	4. Chapter 4

I burst through the door.

I see Faith twist round suddenly, her eyes landing on me, and a small smirk appearing on her face.

My eyes then turn to Angel, whose widen eyes were already fixed on me before my eyes could land on his.

" What's going on?" I demand.

Soon both their thoughts fill my brain.

**Angel - Oh my god, what is she doing here? I bet she's assuming Faith is here because something is going on between us. I know she thought that anyway, she's bound to think it** **now. I bet she wont even let me explain that she just turned up here looking for a fight.**

**Faith - Here she is, little miss perfect slayer. Bet she's wondering what I'm doing with her honey. Wonder if she will start a fight, because I'm ready, I'm ready to take her down. Look at her, all sweetness and light. **

My head hurts from their thoughts invading my head at the same time.

"Buffy-" Angel begins.

" Shut up" I yell as I cover my hands over my ears.

I cant take the noise of it , Giles is right, something is happening. But I'm so angry at the two of them being here together, what is going on, what is he doing with her. After everything I heard him thought as well.

**Angel - What's wrong with her, Why is she covering her ears like that. She looks in agony.**

**Faith - What's a matter with her? Is this some kind of stunt.**

I cant take my thoughts as well as theirs bleeding into my head.

" Yo B" Faith yells.

I look up, my eyes going blurry.

" What I thought it wouldn't be long enough before you tracked me down, so I thought Id save you a journey in looking for me" Faith gloats, " figure this would be one place to start".

**Faith - Come on, you and me B, round 2. She looks weak right now. What's wrong with her. I can take her.**

" Buffy-" Angel says again walking towards me.

All of a sudden everything goes dark.


End file.
